Last week I had the good fortune of attending my brother’s wedding in Puerto Rico (yay weddings!) and while talking to a friend of mine was reminded beliefs shape reality. What I mean is what I believe dictates what happens in my world. This is a very small example but on the flight home yesterday a woman walked down the aisle carrying a Styrofoam cup of soda in addition to her bags. She couldn’t put her bags in the overhead bin and carry her soda at the same time so instead she turned to a man sitting in the aisle seat and said, “Here, can you hold this?” and handed it off to him. What struck me about her interaction with him is she didn’t even question the idea he would hold her soda. Asking him to hold it was a formality because she handed it off to him before he even responded; she assumed he would say yes all along. She believed he would say yes and he did.
What’s interesting to me about beliefs is they seem to come from a different place than thoughts. I don’t know about you, but when I even say the word “belief” I feel something in my heart. It evokes an emotion. When I think something it’s more head-centered. Another interesting thing about beliefs is they leave little room for doubt. There is no wishy-washy-ness. You either believe something or you don’t.
I bring this up because despite my post from a few weeks ago I’ve still been wrestling with feelings of jealousy about someone else’s life. I want an aspect of what she has and somehow I’ve been feeling like it’s unavailable to me. When I spoke to my friend about it she said, “It all comes down to belief. What you believe is mirrored back to you.” When she said that to me I felt such relief because it’s so true. If I believe I will always be taken care of, that money will always come to me, that people will treat me kindly, they will. There is no room for doubt and uncertainty. I have to bring my heart into it, to know it with the fullness of my being.
I think that’s what the whole Abraham Hicks deal is about; really it’s the law of attraction in action. It’s putting the energy of my heart into something. It’s when affirmations start to take root. That’s some pretty powerful stuff.
I bring this up because instead of going through the machinations of how to change my life by following in the footsteps of other people, first and foremost I have to change my beliefs. I have to believe I can make a living doing what I love, I have to believe people will enjoy my book, I have to believe I’ll eventually get married. Because from the beliefs everything else follows. I love knowing I can change my beliefs, that I can change my reality, that I can make things so that were not so before. That I can absolutely do everything I want, live the life I want, and have what I so desire in others just by changing my heart-centered beliefs. And the way I do that is by asking my higher power for help.
I dream of a world where we all understand we are co-creators of our reality. A world where we know beliefs shape our lives. A world where we understand our hearts are more important than our heads. A world where we flow with life knowing we can have what we desire as long as we shift the focus back to ourselves.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
I debated whether or not to even write this post because it’s so personal but all day I’ve been getting messages about the importance of authenticity and sharing our personal experiences in an effort to help others, so here goes. . .
I am CRAZY envious of a blogger I know. I’m talking the super ugly, “I want what she has” envy. She has a crazy popular blog that’s been featured in women’s magazines and gets something like 100 comments a day, she has a loving husband, she’s published a book, AND she’s appeared on national television for it. Can we just establish here I so want those things? (Except maybe the 100 comments a day on my blog, seeing as how there isn’t really much for people to comment on. . .) I really don’t want to admit how envious I am. ESPECIALLY not to other people! I’m not proud of how I feel, but that doesn’t change the fact the feeling exists. I wish it did, but it doesn’t.
In some ways I think envy is a good thing. It reminds me what I fiercely want out of life. It reminds me what my goals are. But it’s important to remember we are all human and this fellow blogger has her trials and tribulations. She has her own things she’s going through and I probably wouldn’t want to trade my woes for hers. Going a bit deeper into it, really what envy is about is escape. I want to escape into someone else’s life because it looks better than mine. The truth is even if someone else’s life is better than mine it doesn’t mean I can do anything about it. We can’t trade places. Also, maybe all those things I envy in this woman are on their way to me. Maybe this time next year all those things will be true for me. I don’t have to rush anything. I could talk about the danger of comparing myself to other people but I’ve covered that ground already. Instead I’d like to say I live in an abundant and infinite universe. This woman having all of those things doesn’t mean I can’t have them too. If anything, it shows me I can as well.
What I’d really like to say is, “Rebekah, you can have all of those things. Nothing is stopping you.” I don’t need to be envious of this blogger because the only obstacle in my way is me. So instead of continuing to feel envy I say, “Thank you for coming up. For showing me what my heart’s real desires are. Thank you for reminding me what my priorities are and what I’d like to focus on. Now that I’ve acknowledged you, please go away.” Because I can also go on national television. Because I can also have a loving marriage. Because I can also have everything I’ve ever wanted.
I don’t know if I’ve illustrated much progress here but I guess I’m saying every emotion (even the ones I don’t like) serve a purpose. They all deserve to be recognized and looked at. I am a human being with a range of emotions and envy is one of them. But I get to choose whether I continue to feel it. I choose not.
I dream of a world where we all allow ourselves to express our feelings. A world where we give all our emotions a moment in the sun – including the ones we’d rather not face. A world where we recognize every emotion serves a purpose and it’s up to us to suss it out.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.
Right now I’m feeling some tightness in my heart because there are some things I want so badly. I’m comparing myself to other people and wanting what they have. Inherent in those feelings of jealousy and envy is the idea of “can’t.” Why can’t I go to
I think about the book/movie that came out a few years ago, “The Secret,” which details the law of attraction. In essence, the recommendations are think about what you want, really believe you will get it with all your heart, think about it as if you already have it, visualize it, feel good and positive in your life, and feel gratitude for what you already have.
I’m reminding myself the only barrier to anything in life is my own mind. I think about how I’ve always gotten what I wanted – not necessarily in the timeframe I had in mind, but it’s always come true. I think about how a few years ago I walked past the National Cathedral and said to myself, “One day I want to live in this neighborhood.” Three years later I did. I said the same thing about living in
My point though is I’m not a special case. It’s not like only the things I want most in the world come true. Our minds are powerful beyond measure. If we get out of our own way, anything is possible (and probable). Instead of spiraling into negativity saying things like, “Oh, it’s too expensive,” or “I’ll never get the time off,” or whatever it is, I’d rather be in a place of complete trust and surrender. I’d rather be in the place where I know beyond a shadow of a doubt all my deepest wishes will come true at the proper moment. Where I believe there are no blocks in my life, there are no hindrances, only open skies and smooth sailing.
I dream of a world where we all move through life with love and ease and grace feeling at peace with our lives because we know what we wish will come true. Where we are each our own biggest ally, where we know the mind can accomplish anything and indeed it will. I dream of a world where we feel gratitude for our lives knowing what we want comes to us, because it always does. A world where we understand our own power. A world where we experience life as the magical existence we always thought it could be.
Another world is not only possible, it’s probable.