Last night I watched The Social Network. Seeing how much Mark Zuckerberg (the creator of Facebook) has accomplished at such a young age brought on a deluge of ego-centric thoughts. “Why haven’t I done as much? How come I’m not as successful as he is? I want to do big things too! I want to [...]
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This week I fell into a tizzy. I submitted the first 10 pages of my book Just a Girl From Kansas to a professional copy editor and she chopped out all the parts I felt were important. It wasn’t so much her suggested edits, but her deletions that got to me. I felt like she [...]
“When I publish my book, I’ll be happy. When I marry a gorgeous guy, I’ll be happy. When I finish all my work, I’ll be happy.” When, when, when. I know I’ve written about happiness before, but now I’m deepening my understanding of it.Lately I feel like I have a split personality disorder because there [...]
I’ve been lying to myself for quite some time now. I’ve believed something that is blatantly not true but I’m resentful it’s false. You see, I honestly believed if I was a good girl, if I behaved, I would get everything I wanted. I believed God was like Santa Claus who rewarded the virtuous and [...]
On Sunday it occurred to me my body is my friend, not my enemy. For years I heard the expression, “The body is a temple,” but I never knew what it meant. It sounds so hokey. “The body is a temple.” Ok. Right. I’ll refrain from drugs and alcohol and make sure to eat my [...]
Today I was supposed to meet a friend of mine at 1 p.m. It didn’t happen. Everything took so much longer than I expected – my appointment, the bus, the walk. I sat fidgeting in my bus seat at 1:30 because, “Oh my god! I’m so late! He’s standing outside my apartment waiting for me!” [...]
This past week I was in New Hampshire visiting friends and seeing one of my personal heroes, Elizabeth Gilbert speak about her new book. During that time I came to realize just how much I seek love and approval from others. How someone else’s approval is so valuable to me, I’m willing to do almost anything [...]
Some of you already know this, but as a child I went through some pretty severe peer rejection. I had almost no friends and spent much of my time reading or taking walks by myself. I mostly played games with my sister, five years my junior. We used to choreograph dances in our living room [...]
I almost don’t want to tell you this because it’s kind of embarrassing. I don’t want you to judge me or think I’m ungrateful for the people in my life. But what I’m about to discuss is also indicative of a deeper issue, which I think might be valuable to share. Have you heard of [...]
“It’s all my fault. I’m to blame. Why didn’t I do it differently? Why didn’t I know better?” I loooove to play the blame game. I love to have that dialogue in my head (more like diatribe). On Tuesday I went to the physical therapist and looked at myself in the mirror. As I did [...]