On Tuesday I said to a friend of mine one of my greatest fears is that I can’t trust my higher power. He said in response, “Sounds like you need to redefine your higher power.”Whoa. He was right. I’ve been paying lip service to the idea of an unconditionally loving God/Brahma/the Universe/higher power, but if [...]
love
I left work early on Monday because I was experiencing some physical pain. As I walked home I felt overcome with guilt, even though my pain was legitimate. I felt guilty because I’ve been putting myself above work recently, taking time off to deal with a pinched nerve or an illness or whatever, and I [...]
I used to believe I had to “conquer” my fears. I used to be of the mindset I had to squash doubt flat, or wrestle with my other issues until I won. That I had to assert my will and come out the victor. I realized a while ago that’s not the case at all.In [...]
Today I am tired. And crabby. And my hair is sticking up all over the place. But you know what? I love myself anyway. Even though I feel all those things, even though my physical appearance is not what I’d like, I still love myself. And that is practically a miracle. (Actually Marianne Williamson would [...]
I didn’t intend to write this today. If you read AWIP regularly you know I blog on Thursdays and today is Monday but here I am writing anyway. I’m writing because some things are coming up and I think it might be fruitful to share them. On Saturday I hosted an EFT workshop through the [...]
I want to be perfect. My idea of “perfect” has changed dramatically from external things like having a hot body, a cute boyfriend, a great job, etc. to internal things like being fearless, living in the moment, trusting in the universe, etc. But of course I want it all RIGHT NOW. And I beat myself [...]
Reading A Return To Love, this week I felt really deeply the truth, “You are already loved.” I think back to a conversation I had with a friend of mine roughly five years ago. She and I chatted on AIM about our respective boy troubles and I remember this moment of profundity when I said [...]
This week the only thing I can talk about is surrender. I know I’ve written about surrender many times before but this week is the first time I think I really got it. In the past when I spoke of surrender it was usually in the context of a last-ditch effort. As in, “Well, nothing [...]
Last week I wrote about releasing fear and returning to love. This week has been an application of that lesson, especially as it relates to things I would deem horrific, such as the earthquake in Haiti. On Saturday I continued reading Marianne Williamson’s A Return To Love. As I sat on the BART train on [...]
I can say unequivocally my entire life I’ve had the fear I would be overpowered. I’ve been afraid someone would come in and overwhelm me physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. During the holidays I had a major breakthrough and it’s a fear I carry no more. I’ve written before about looking fear in the face and [...]